Lesson 1. Expressing sexuality is normal, even if your body is imperfect
“How do they do it?” - healthy people are always curious about how people with disabilities have sex. Isn’t everything below the waist paralyzed in a guy in a wheelchair? How to hug a girl without arms?
The lack of information gives rise to prejudices:
- Disability = frigidity. In the public consciousness, a person with physical limitations cannot and should not want sex.
- Offering sex to a person with a disability or agreeing to it is immoral.
People with disabilities have sex. A lot and often. And this is normal. You will understand this if you enter into an intimate relationship with a person who has a disability.
By stepping over another prejudice of society, you will take another step towards inner freedom. And most importantly, you will stop being ashamed of your body. After all, if this person has overcome their complexes and could stand before you naked, do you need to be ashamed of your birthmark or extra weight?
The fact that we, like everyone else, make love never occurs to anyone. If a young man sees a beautiful girl with a disability, a reckless thought might flash through his mind, but that often ends there. Out of fear of the unknown, the incomprehensible, even if beautiful. People pity the disabled, but nobody will have sex out of pity.
I know many couples where one partner has a disability and the other does not. The public is surprised by such couples because they are sure that they have no future, no sex, no continuation. There is only self-sacrifice and resignation. When a child is born to such a couple, the outrage grows — but nothing works there!
This is simple ignorance. Disability does not make us inadequate sexual partners. As a rule, it does not affect our desires and possibilities in sex.
Lesson 2. It’s important to listen to and hear your partner
Some couples never discuss their intimate life. Because conversations about sex are also tabooed by societal morality. Men and women are caught up in a wave of burning shame when trying to voice their fantasies and feelings.
To have sex with a partner with a disability, you will have to part ways with awkwardness. Without prior discussion of positions, acceptable gestures, and other nuances, little is likely to happen.
Openness, when you reveal not only your body but also your soul to a person, takes the relationship to a new level. You begin to trust each other completely and, most importantly, to listen to your partner's desires.
In any couple, there is mutual consent and certain agreements between partners, a threshold of trust, rules — this is part of sexual life. If one of the partners has a disability, additional conditions are added to the aforementioned that do not cause rejection over time.
Not having sex standing up is one of the main rules for a partner in a wheelchair. But if you consider how many other options there are, such a limitation becomes nonsense. You need to communicate without embarrassment to make it comfortable and "tasty" for both.
Lesson 3. Sex is not reduced to a sexual act
In the film "The Intouchables," Driss once asked paralyzed Philippe if he could get any sexual satisfaction at all. Do you remember what Philippe replied?
Ears! The erogenous zone of the hero of this wonderful film turned out to be the earlobes. In exchange for non-working parts of the body, people with disabilities develop sensitivity in the most unexpected places. You just need to find them.
Having sex with a person with physical limitations will teach you to be inventive. Striving to give each other the maximum pleasure, you will seek and find together unexpected erogenous zones. And you will also understand that sex is more than just a sexual act.
There is nothing shameful about sex if it is by mutual consent of the partners. Sex is a constant search for new sensations, positions, and zones of pleasure. The main thing is not to be embarrassed to offer something new to your partner and not to be afraid of rejection.
A survey conducted at Loverssex's office showed that most of our guys have a normal attitude toward the expressions of sexuality by people with disabilities. Despite this, it would likely be difficult for them to decide to have sex with such a person.
And what do you think about “unequal” sex? Would you be able to grasp the lessons outlined above?
