Relax and turn off your head, increase sensitivity and experience an amazing sense of unity with your partner — breathing techniques can help with this.
Don't know what to do — breathe.
This rule permeates all areas of my life. I can bet that the overwhelming majority of people not involved in sports, vocals, yoga, martial arts, or mindfulness practices pay attention to their breathing only when something is wrong: it smells bad, falters, and so on.
At the same time, in all ancient practices of working with consciousness and the body, you will find exercises related to breathing. And this is understandable. Mindful work with breathing helps relax, focus, increase sensitivity, become aroused, and attune to other people. In singing, without proper breathing, it is impossible to produce a strong and even voice, in various sports — to run, swim, lift.
So, in sex, breathing is no less important. I will explain in more detail in which situations conscious breathing can be used in sex.
Turn off your head
When you focus on the sensations in your body, it automatically stops grinding thoughts in your head. Attention to breathing is the most accessible way to return to those very sensations. If your case is thoughts during sex about work and household chores that bother you, try deep even breathing (try to exhale through the mouth and make it 1.5–2 times longer than the inhale).
Notice important processes
The flip side of returning to sensations. "Flying out" of the body into distracting thoughts helps not to notice what is happening to us at all. What is pleasant and what is not.
By constantly paying attention to your breathing and deepening it, you may discover what brings you pleasant sensations and what — unpleasant or even painful.
The effect is especially noticeable if you breathe slowly: you simply have enough time to understand what is happening.
And you may also feel anxious or even scared. You need to be able to deal with these emotions and discuss them with your partner. So be careful.
Relax
When you are tense, it can be difficult to enjoy. And again, breathing will help. By the way, deep slow breathing helps create a sense of comfort and safety. For many women, this is a necessary factor for arousal. But it is also relevant for men.
Take note if you are very anxious before sex.
A few conscious deep inhales and exhales — and you are already better prepared for sex.
Focus
A woman's orgasm can sometimes be very fragile; it can be easily "scared away." If you try to breathe deeply during the approach to orgasm while keeping attention simultaneously on the breath and the area where you have concentrated pre-orgasmic sensations, it will be harder to distract you.
Increase arousal and enhance sensitivity
Deepening and slowing down your breathing helps increase blood oxygen saturation and blood circulation in the tissues, which in turn enhances sensitivity.
Quickening your breath increases arousal. If you want more lively, passionate sex, you can try breathing quickly and unevenly. Just be careful: if you feel a slight dizziness, breathe more calmly.
You can also help yourself by adding sound. No, it's not about imitating, like in porn. When you add your voice — moaning, growling, sighing (only those that personally feel appropriate to you) — you become even more aroused. If the sounds are rhythmic, it may even take you into a light or "deep" trance. Enjoy.
Moreover, people involuntarily hold their breath before reaching orgasm. This is quite natural. But try not to do this, but on the contrary, deepen and/or quicken your breathing. The result may pleasantly surprise you.
Some may experience stronger sensations from limiting breathing — asphyxiation, but such games often end sadly, so please don't do this without basic medical training.
Attune with your partner
People familiar with tantric partner exercises understand well what incredible things breath synchronization can create. Breathing in sync, and sometimes out of phase — one inhales, the other exhales — you can achieve an amazing feeling of unity, dissolving into each other, building arousal together. This feeling gives, I tell you, transcendent experiences.
Dominate
I mastered this life hack about five years ago in Ericksonian hypnosis classes and began to actively use it in my sexual practices. When I want my partner to follow me, relax, or become more aroused, immersed in their sensations, I make eye contact and suggest that my partner breathe along with me. Then I can make the breathing deeper and more even or more frequent and interrupted — it all depends on the goal. And the partner just repeats after me.
If you do this calmly and confidently, the partner feels safe and willingly follows. This works especially well with those who are used to controlling everything. Men, you can also do this with your female partners if you are both interested in such games.
Try, experiment, come up with your own ways of working with breathing and enjoy.
