Threesome: what you need to know to make everyone happy

Foreword

When the advice in this article won't help:

• if you met by chance for one time;
• if you are two guys or two girls who right now want thrills;
• if you don't care what will happen afterward, you are not planning to repeat and, in general, you are not worried whether everyone will be satisfied.

Here I will give advice that will help a couple get new sensations and not get burned on this.

Why is it necessary to bring variety into your sex life? Passion fades over time, and this is a proven fact. If you have been together for more than three years, you already understand what I am talking about. My wife and I have been together for much longer and still maintain an interest in each other. A trio is one of the ways. This article is for established couples who seek to diversify their sexual life. I will share my experience from a man's perspective.

I will not talk about how to approach this or convince your partner. I assume that your relationship is open enough and you communicate with each other about your desires. If not — you need to start somewhere else. Here are articles that will help you:

• Let's talk frankly: 5 rules of communication in sex.
• Say 'yes': the nature of consent in sex.
• Main qualities of a good sexual partner.

First Experience

The first experience of a trio is a test for any relationship. The first time you need to treat each other with special care. Make it clear that you are here for each other, the highest value for you is your relationship, not the invited participant.

If you see during the process that your partner doesn't like something, take a break, take him or her to the bathroom and talk.

Tell each other how much you love one another. Relax, calm down, inspire — well, you know best what to say to your spouse. And if discomfort disappears — continue. If not — it’s better to finish for today. You will have another chance to try.

If you haven't had similar experiences before, don’t rush to invite good acquaintances to your place. If something goes wrong, you risk spoiling the relationship with the third participant for a long time. If you have the slightest doubts, start off by practicing with a professional. Observe each other's reactions. Afterward, discuss whether you liked everything and make sure to show how much you care for each other. It's very important to understand that your partner values you.

So, you have made up your mind. Next, you need to decide on the format.

Formats

MFM

The simplest format is MFM. It is simple because this way a woman is easily satisfied, and it almost always ends successfully.

Pros:

1. Two men can satisfy a woman much more fully than one. Four hands, two mouths, two penises. Double penetration. Double pleasure. One of the most common fantasies for a woman is her and two studs (or more). The lady feels like a queen, being the focus of attention from two men at once.

2. With some experience from at least one of the participants, this method requires almost no preparation. A woman only needs to trust; after that, everything will fall into place. Two men will always find something to do with the woman.

3. Everyone has heard of multiple orgasms in women. The male body is arranged differently. Men need time to recover after ejaculation, and the MFM trio is the perfect option for this. While one is engaged in active actions, the other rests, and vice versa. This way, you can ensure hours of continuous ecstasy.

4. There is no danger of transferring microflora. If the invited man uses a condom, then no one will receive new microbes and fungi. Unlike the FMF format, where safety must be monitored much more carefully.

Cons:

1. A woman must trust at least one of the men, and the trust must be justified. Someone should be able to hear: “Stop, I don’t want this.” Four strong hands in the heat of passion greatly reduce the partner's degree of freedom, and it’s easy to overlook if something causes her discomfort. For example, specifically in this position, she may feel pain from his friction. Moans of pleasure and cries of pain are poorly distinguishable, especially if you don’t know each other well. There must be someone who can stop any actions that are unpleasant for the woman, change positions, or amplitude.

Or, for example, she didn’t intend to engage in anal sex today. In the heat of passion, two men can easily insist on their own. This is not coercion, no. After another orgasm, exhausted, the girl may simply not have time or strength to object. But later she will say: “No, I didn’t want this; it just happened. I was against it, it was uncomfortable for me.” And the impression will be spoiled, and there will be resentment. To avoid this, a safe word should be established.

2. In our country, homophobia is strong. Men must realize that they will end up in the same bed with another naked man with an erect penis. And there are no options to avoid accidental touches at all. If you are frightened by the sight of a risen jade shaft next to you, if you blush with a suffocating wave, slightly brushing against something — refrain from such adventures. Mental health is more valuable.

FMF

The FMF format is much more complicated.

Among men, there is a common legend that sex with two women is just wow! A captivating image arises before your eyes: two beauties dance, kiss passionately, caress each other, occasionally enticingly glancing at the man. Becoming intensely aroused, they call him to them and, trembling with desire, pounce on him.

Nonsense.

In nine out of ten cases, either one or both women remain unsatisfied and unhappy with the party, no matter what they tell you.

There are many reasons:

• a man paid her less attention than she wanted;
• a man spent too long with the second partner, while the first had time to cool off;
• a man became overly aroused and finished too quickly;
• one of the partners turned out to be jealous;
• the girls began to compare themselves and suffer from their imaginary physical shortcomings, and so on.

The main reason is that male strength and attention were insufficient for both at the same time. There is a way out, and below I will explain how to organize an FMF trio and satisfy both.

Pros:

1. It’s very beautiful. The sight of two naked women in one bed is a delightful spectacle. Men, with rare exceptions, find lesbian erotica captivating. No wonder this is one of the most popular plots in the porn industry. Most women like it too.

2. The FMF format allows for the revelation of female sexuality. According to statistics, more than 70% of women are bisexual or would like to try. Not all of them are ready to admit this even to themselves, and from these 70%, a significant part may never get this experience. An FMF trio is an excellent and safe way to explore this area of your sexuality.

Cons:

1. It’s easy to spoil. I described the reasons above. A man will have to give his all to satisfy both. This is really difficult, and all three risk being dissatisfied.

In addition, women are more sensitive than men to catch any nuances of the trio's mood and react to them. One unsuccessful joke — and the temperature of arousal drops by ten degrees. Or, for example, a woman usually drinks semi-sweet, but you bought brut.

Moreover, women are more shy with each other than with men. “Oh no, she will see my extra pounds on my thighs, horror, turn off the light quickly!” The FMF is a fragile system.

2. Considering the first point, you need to prepare for such a meeting in advance. If the partners are not very familiar with each other, they need to get to know each other better. Learn about their tastes. Make sure that the invited girl is not afraid and trusts you. Remind your woman how much you love her; it’s never unnecessary. Make sure your woman feels no threat from the invited one. And other details, more on them below.

3. In the FMF format, enhanced safety measures must be observed. The transfer of vaginal microflora from one woman to another can occur not only by penis but also by fingers, lips, and other body parts. If you are caressing the vagina of one with your fingers, before you engage with another, you need to wash your hands or somehow treat them.

4. Among women, there is a significant percentage who do not accept sex or even just erotic games with a person of their gender. If there will be such a girl (or both) in your pair — they won’t like it. You can try: perhaps they will awaken interest. Sometimes that happens, but hardly the first time.

How to arrange an FMF meeting so that everyone remains satisfied and wants more?

A man, to satisfy two women alone, must be a sex giant. In our time of poor ecology, such beings are vanishingly rare. But there is another way: collaboration.

A quality FMF format is a team game where two partners deal with a third.

Start with the invited girl. Together with your regular partner, give all your attention to her. Then, after the climax and resting, switch roles and engage with your woman, again together.

You are lucky if the partners in your trio have tendencies towards bisexuality. Then the thought of caressing another participant together with you will be well received. But what if they are strictly heterosexual?

To help you and not stay idle, they don’t need to imitate lesbian porn, perform cunnilingus, or fondle breasts. Even kissing is not necessary. Simple harmless caresses on the back, abdomen, and legs are enough. Kisses on the neck, shoulders, and ears. Gentle touches to the head and hair. Even just hugging, looking into each other's eyes, and encouragingly smiling while the man fully caresses her. Believe me, this excites all three even in the case of 100% heterosexuality.

This method significantly increases the probability of success. For this, it should be understood and accepted by your partner, and better — by both girls.

General Practical Tips

There are several important points to consider when planning. Your first meeting will likely go completely differently than you imagined. But still, you can foresee something.

1. The most important: all three must like each other. If at least one participant has unpleasant feelings toward any other — sex will only exacerbate them. In this combination, nothing will work out. Stop and start looking for a partner from scratch.

2. To break off an orgy that has gone too far, establish a safe word with your regular partner. Anyone who hears it must immediately stop the action. In what situations this is necessary, I described above.

3. Some sexologists recommend abstaining from sex for several days before the meeting, as well as including aphrodisiac products in your diet. I agree with them.

4. It’s better to meet in neutral territory. The invited partner — girl or man — will feel awkward in the hosts' apartment in any case. Unless you have a large country house with a bath and a guest bedroom. In the hosts' apartment, a tactful person will be bound by the norms of guest behavior, while in a rented apartment or hotel room, everyone is equal. In neutral territory, it will be easier for you to relax.

A rented apartment with good decor is the best. Then a hamam. According to some girls, a sauna is good because if an awkward pause in the conversation suddenly arises, it can always be filled with the words "Let's go to the pool!".

As a last resort — a hotel room. Not everyone will like going into the room together in front of the guards. The worst option is a rundown Khrushchyovka building. Don't even consider it.

If you have the opportunity, make sure in advance of the cleanliness of the premises. Bring slippers. Dirty floors and dust on the furniture are a surefire way to spoil the first impression of an evening that hasn't even begun.

5. Create a romantic atmosphere. Soft music, candles, flowers, chocolate, dim light. This is important for a woman, even when you are alone together. In such a delicate matter as a trio, romance is crucial.

If you are not sure that all participants like scented candles, do not use them, take regular ones. Some people find their smell unpleasant.

You can select music yourself or take one of the specialized podcasts.

6. I have heard advice to start the evening with watching porn. From my point of view, this is questionable and heavily depends on the partners' preferences. Decide for yourselves.

7. Stock up on fruits, water, and light snacks. For someone, light snacks are half a banana, for another, half a grilled chicken. Everything is relative, so it’s worth finding out in advance what kind of snacks and what drinks each prefers. It’s better to have less food and drinks, and lighter. Strong alcohol should be excluded. Water is a must!

8. Have enough lubricants and contraceptive methods. Prepare disinfectants like "Miramistin." They can be used to treat a man’s hands during action if you have an FMF, and the genitals afterward. Here is and here a comprehensive guide on how to use it.

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I shared my experience with you. If you want to add or clarify something — write a comment to this article, I will definitely read and reply.

Good luck, and go for it!