Sex

How to bring a man to orgasm with your hands and enjoy it yourself.

How to bring a man to orgasm with your hands and enjoy it yourself.

Masturbation is often underrated. Especially when it comes to giving pleasure to another. But according to the opinion of sexologist Vanessa Marin, using hands is one of the best ways to bring a partner to orgasm. The main thing is to know how to masturbate properly.

Make sure the man agrees

Vanessa Marin
sexologist

Some men do not like it when their partner caresses the penis with their hand. Others may simply not want to masturbate at that moment. And that's okay.

Therefore, it is important not only to secure consent but to hear that the thought of upcoming caresses excites the man.

By the way, you should also want this. Truly and at this moment, because desire is critically important for quality sex and its components. If the man notices that you are doing everything on autopilot, are not aroused, and are thinking about something else, it will be difficult for him to fake pleasure.

If you are trying masturbation for the first time, tell your partner that you want this just as much as he does, that you are interested in trying something new. Pay attention to the penis, compliment its size and shape. This will excite the man even more.

Prepare yourself

Wash your hands with soap or use antiseptic. Observing hygiene rules is essential in any situation.

Remove rings and make sure your nails do not hurt the penis. Make sure your hands are warm.

Remember which areas you need to involve. If very briefly and without going into details, the penis consists of the body and the glans, and at its base are the testicles. If the man is circumcised, during an erection the glans will be exposed; if not, it will be hidden beneath the foreskin. From the glans to the body of the penis below runs a skin fold—the frenulum. Don't forget that it is very sensitive. A small area between the testicles and the anus is called the perineum.

And you need to pay attention to everything.

Assume a comfortable position

Here you can let your imagination run wild. The classic option is when the man lies on his back and the woman sits opposite. You can straighten your legs, tuck them underneath you, or cross them. Focus on your feelings.

If the partner wants to watch, he can sit or stand, and you—choose a comfortable position.

Use lubricant

Absolutely necessary. Lubricant will ensure better glide and prevent dry hands from hurting the delicate skin of the penis. You can choose one that suits you: water-based, silicone, or oil-based.

Ask to show you how to properly masturbate

If you think you know better, you are mistaken. Not in this case. You have been entrusted with something very intimate, so take the effort to inquire about your partner's desires and preferences. Ask him to show how he masturbates when alone.

Watch the movements, grip strength, and speed. Firstly, you will know how he likes it. Secondly, it is arousing. You can ask the man to place his hands on yours to guide you.

Vanessa recommends paying special attention to the grip strength.

Some men note that their partner does not grip the penis with enough strength because she is afraid of hurting him. Try different variations and ask your partner to stop you when you hit the right spot.

Vanessa Marin
sexologist

Use different techniques

Alternate movements, change speed and grip strength, and the orgasm will not keep you waiting. Start slowly, and when the man is sufficiently aroused, gradually increase the pace.

Remember the basic movements

Your basic movements with your hand are up and down.

But you don't have to limit yourself to this. Moreover, Vanessa recommends improving this motion. Gently move your wrist back and forth to provide additional stimulation to the penis.

Focus on the hyper-sensitive glans of the penis

Pay attention to the glans: slow down your movements when you reach it, and slightly increase grip strength. Stroke the frenulum with your finger. Just very gently!

You can try starting from the top in such a way that the penis is only touched by the pads of your fingers, and when moving down, the glans presses against the middle of your palm.

Make a ring with your thumb and index finger

Without unclenching your fingers, move them up and down. Stop at the glans and gently rotate it.

Use your second hand

When you find a comfortable position and get used to it, bring your second hand into play. You can place it over the leading hand and continue the basic movements. Or use your fingers to play, encompass your partner's penis with both hands and perform circular movements.

Take the penis in one hand and move it slowly up and down. At the same time, with the index, middle, ring, and thumb of the second hand, move from the base to the glans, stroking it as if you are unscrewing a bottle cap.

Try to take the penis with both hands so that the two thumbs are on one side. With these fingers, gently stroke the glans from the bottom up and top down.

Create the illusion of endless penetration

Another interesting technique: make only downward movements from the glans to the base of the penis first with one hand and then with the second. This will create the illusion of endless penetration.

Vanessa Marin
sexologist

After, try the opposite: move only from the base to the glans. Just be careful not to pull the skin too much, as this can cause discomfort.

Open your palms

Hold the penis between your palms and stroke it with the inner part either along or across, gently twisting. Or you can gently stroke the area under the glans with the edge of your palm.

Or try to create the illusion of endless penetration using your palms without clenching your fists.

Involve other parts of the body

Don't focus solely on the penis. Caress the thighs, testicles, perineum, or buttocks. Be gentle with the testicles, as they have very high sensitivity.

Take both testicles in your hand and very gently squeeze and pull. Hold the skin between the testicles with your thumb and index finger and smoothly stroke it from the base to the edge.

Vanessa Marin
sexologist

Some men enjoy anal stimulation. Discuss this with your partner and go for it if the answer is positive.

Think of yourself as well

Do not hesitate to touch yourself and indulge in feelings. Your man will like it. Be honest and enjoy the process, reaping benefits for yourself too.

Let's reiterate: you should not distance yourself, making monotonous up-and-down motions with a sad face. Be active, show interest, demonstrate excitement.

Watch the reaction

Glance at your partner's face, listen to his breathing, and watch for erections. If you feel that the erection is weakening or the partner is not showing interest, try changing the technique or ask what’s wrong. Just make sure to do this gently and carefully. If necessary, pass control temporarily to the man and observe his movements.

Don’t stop immediately after orgasm

A male orgasm can last How Long Does The Male Orgasm Last? It Turns Out, Male And Female Orgasms More Alike Than You Think from 5 to 30 seconds. If you see that the partner is on the edge, continue in the same spirit, change nothing. Watch the reaction and do not stop after the orgasm.

Gradually slow down, gently and smoothly relax your hand. Just don’t overdo it: after ejaculation, sensitivity of the penis increases, and even the slightest touch can cause discomfort.

Find out if he enjoyed it

Do not hesitate to ask your partner to share his feelings. Find out what he liked the most and what was not so pleasant. Listen to the man and work on the feedback.

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