Mosquitoes and hiking enthusiasts have already activated, which means it's time to talk about outdoor sex. I analyzed my experience and concluded that if you follow these rules, everything will go cooler than at home.
1. Make sure no one is around
Having sex outdoors is a hundred percent extreme. There are no locking doors and at least cardboard walls. But there are random passersby and friends (if you're outdoors with them). Choose a spot that is protected from prying eyes and ears. You can walk away from your friends deeper into the woods — to where no children from the neighboring picnic can run in. You probably don't want to blush and pull up your pants at the most inappropriate moment.
2. Find a comfortable place
Oh yes, at first you think that that branch under your butt isn't bothering you too much or the stones aren't digging into every part of your body that touches the ground. But three minutes will pass, and another song will begin: your brain will jump from pleasure to "Damn, why is this so uncomfortable," and you'll have quite a thorny path to orgasm.
Assess the surface that will temporarily replace your cozy bed. Well, how does it look? Sand, branches, stones — a bad idea. It won't be good for the one who will be on the bottom. So, take an inflatable mattress (but it makes the process a bit too cozy) or a thick blanket.
3. Consider hygiene
A shower in the woods is out of the question, and you already smell a bit like a campfire and sweat. I agree, sometimes that's sexy. But then you will have to think about how to clean up from excess lubricant, traces of grass, or sperm. So, buy a large pack of intimate hygiene wipes in advance and bring a bottle of water.
4. Eliminate possible irritants
Mosquitoes, spiders, wasps, and other inhabitants of the forest will catch up with you sooner or later. So my advice is: go into the tent. It's the only thing that will save you.
It's not worth applying insect repellent: if you want to kiss something other than lips — you'll definitely taste the bitterness.
I always ignored the wildlife until one day during outdoor sex a dog from the neighboring picnic approached us. We laughed, of course, but after that, I couldn't be persuaded for intimacy outside the tent.
5. Take weather conditions into account
Having sex in the rain is romantic, sex under the scorching sun is cinematic, sex in the snow is extreme. But then it gets bad: you'll be faced with a cold or a sunburned body. If your sex is cool enough that you can endure it, then go for it. If not, choose spots in the shade, protected from the rain with a canopy, or use the tent after all.
6. Don't forget about safety
Having sex outdoors is inherently injury-prone. Problems can vary: from bites by different wildlife (for example, my best friend was bitten in the groin by a tick) to careless movements during ecstasy leading to bruises and injuries. Assess the situation, your body position, and everything you can reach. If scrapes and bruises are manageable, then wounds from broken glass lying nearby are not so nice. So inspect the area and choose something the safest.
7. Don't overdo it with alcohol
You will definitely wipe out everything you've just read in your mind if you get drunk.
Alcohol will whisper: "Oh, come on, sharp stones! Sit down, it's sex!" But in the morning, you'll be the one dealing with the consequences.
There are two options: drink a little to control the situation, or prepare everything in advance. Yes, sex can be spontaneous. But if there's even a slight chance that you'll be intimate, be prepared for it. Spread out a blanket and place the wipes nearby. If there is no sex — just pack up your things, and if it happens — you will thank yourself more than once.
8. Choose the right positions
In outdoor sex, there will always be a kind of victim — the one who is on the bottom. The back of this person will then be marked with fun imprints of everything that was on the ground. So the most comfortable position is when the man is sitting on his butt, and the woman is on top. This way, the body minimally touches the blanket lying on the ground, which means there will be less damage from the stones and branches. Plus, it's a really cool position where the woman can control the depth and frequency of thrusts, making it easier to achieve orgasm.
There's another option — standing positions. The main thing here is to match heights like yin and yang, because partners with a height difference of more than 10 cm will have to struggle with bent knees and tiptoes. And yes, you'll have to lean against something, and there are probably bugs, sharp twigs, and other joys of nature on the nearest trees, so choose the level of extremity that you can handle.
Which of these tips to follow and which not — choose based on your own preferences. Because there is a certain thrill in dealing with the consequences of a sudden passion in the woods later. Just try to minimize them somehow, so you don't regret what you did, but want to repeat it.
